The Synthetic Seven penultimate stresser

Tonight is not the night to be poetic and imaginative, it is a night to be blunt and be myself. Well would you look at that… The author has actual referred to himself for once.

We all have stresses in our lives, covering the seven entities of our outward beings. I call these the “Synthetic Seven.” These entities include social, family, friendship, work, love, home and the most difficult, internal self. All of these entities have affected each and every one of us negatively one time or another of our lives, whether it be a minute amount or the weight of the world resting upon us. Thus, causing stresses, depression and/or anxiety for ourselves.

My plan is to not discuss each of these with you, my endearing audience, I might glance over a few just to give you a little more insight into your beloved author, but there is a point to this writing and I will eventually get to it. Hopefully, sooner than later as to not bore you much.

The Social Synthetic, the synthetic that involves each and every one of us in social surroundings. Whether it be in a group setting of any size, out and about window-shopping or simply walking down the sidewalk, there are variables that bombard us on a daily basis that test our social interactions. To say the least, socially I am simply awkward. To be straight and honest with you, I am. Shyness, introverted and sometimes reclusive is in my nature. This synthetic will always caused stress, of varying levels, whether it be in a small, medium or large group, even with colleagues and family gatherings.  Anxiety and attacks are never too far away when in these settings. As you can tell, the Social Synthetic resonates from some of other synthetics.

The Work Synthetic, the synthetic that involves our work environments and our personal careers and development. Well as you have read in previous posts this is just plain obvious. However, I do absolutely love my career and place of employment and would never want to change it. Well, unless I won the lottery then I am out!

The Love Synthetic, to say I am jaded is being nice. My love life has basically sucked. Let us put it this way, I have never been the breaker-upper. I have been cheated on multiple times, and have always been the one dumped. So, let us move on because this can be its own post later.

The synthetic that is affecting me right now, it is the one that we all should hold very close and dear to ourselves, The Family Synthetic. For myself, my immediate family is everything. My parents are my confidants, the ones I can spew vulgar and insane thoughts, cry my heart out, basically I can scream, complain, yell, jump up and down, it is all fair game with them. I know I have stressed them out on numerous occasions, had them worry, angry and even feel sorry for me.

I love both of my parents with all of my heart, body and soul. I would die for them, care for them, protect them, basically I would sell my soul to the devil to ensure they are healthy and great. With that being said, this is focused on my father for now. One of the grandeur stresses of the Family Synthetic is when someone is ailing. To know that someone who is considered your best-friend (actually one of my only male friends and by far my true one and only best friend), someone you have looked up to your entire life, a man who portrays strength, wisdom, integrity and the living example of pure unfaltering kindness is suddenly stricken weak. Feeling physically bound at the wrists when one of your parents is weak, is mind-numbing exasperating. Well not exactly stressful, but more or less worrisome, which definitely resonates into stress.

Within the Family Synthetic, and with those that cherish others in their family circle, the fights, arguments, opinions and faults can easily be waded through. Those physical pollutions are the Family Synthetic stresses that can be resolved, reconciled through constructive criticism, discussions, interventions and simply talking with one another. The penultimate element of this synthetic is ailments, the variables that are not entirely controllable. To those of us who are extremely close to our parents, this is the time when our Family Synthetic completely breaks down. When those ailments include hospitalization and life-threatening instances, it feels like a mechanic mixed paint thinner into the oil of a vehicle and you begin to feel the knocking and pinging and the breakdown of your entire engine.

For the past two weeks, my Family Synthetic has broken down.  I have dealt with stress for most of my adult life, as I have aged I have been able to learn how to notice stress and depression arising and deal with those stresses and coping with and neutralizing the depression. However, nothing compares to the complete break down of my stress system due to an extreme life-threatening hospitalization of one of my parents. It is hard, extremely hard to handle the stress that comes with seeing one of your parents in dire-straights and not being able to help whatsoever. I shut down, it was hard and still is for me to attempt at socialization. Talking remotely to family and a few friends made me comfortable. However, being holed up in my comfort zone, my house was where I felt the most peace.

Our Synthetic Seven raise and lower our stresses. Our parents, to those of us that hold close bonds with them, continue to hold them close to our hearts. Although the ultimate stress inevitably comes to the forefront, we are going to hit a stressful deep time in our lives. The love, laughs, good and hard times and the memories we shared with them, will always live on within our hearts…. The Family Synthetic stress will subside, but it will be a struggle. Ultimately, it will test our skill of handling the deepest stresses and we will be stronger from it.

Give your mother, father and step parents (if you have them) deep hugs and show them how precious they are to you and always, show them the love you have for them.

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Fossil ears appropriating grouchy

Tempered glass rolled down, rubber laid on the asphalt cruising around exposing others to the nerve burning thumps of bass, the high pitches of tweeters and incomprehensible vocals. Many an aures of homines become perturbed by this invasion of physical pollution.

T’was one aspect when it is being spewed by the blossoming youth, tis another when the proverbial smack across the face comes striking fast and firm, when it is the self that is bothered by the blaring of decibels of their own music. To aquire irritation and scold at the self to lower reverberations is when the realization kicks in that age is creeping by quite rapidly.

Insecurity vs. Red Flags

Insecurities, a bane to one’s self, a hindrance of progressing and a roadblock to many, is also a misread trait among couples, friend and family.  When it comes to the self, insecurities predominantly exist, when those insecurities are perceived to be directed towards another, there are quite a bit of times when it is not an insecurity but a red flag.

Red flags, we all know what these are. They are those pesky little things that go off in our head when we see things that remind us past moments, past actions and past downfalls. They are prevalent in our everyday lives, home-life, work, within family and friends and within the loving bonds of couples. Most people don’t say anything about it, while others do.

Now I am sure that there have been actions or words in my past, that has risen red flags, but has never been pointed out to me. To me, if I see a red flag I am going to say something about it, and here is why:

If a man keeps tight lipped, during questionable times or even loving times, when a red flag appears or keeps appearing, than that man is just not into his woman. 

A real man, one who cares about the relationship and his woman, would not be afraid to say something. A man who doesn’t say anything, could careless about either.

And this is true for women as well, if a woman doesn’t care who you are talking to, if you have tons of female friends and isn’t concerned if red flags appear, she just doesn’t care about her man or the relationship.

No, it’s not an insecurity someone has, it’s a Red Flag, it’s a “I’ve seen that shit before and it wasn’t good” thing.

So sit down with your loved ones, tell them the concerns you have over the red flags, work together to understand the reasoning behind it and make a concerted effort to bring down those flags. If you don’t talk about it, just walk out because you just don’t care.

It’s almost over? But… no it can’t be

Desert_backyardThree glorious weeks of exclusive self-absorption and personal relaxation, oh the joys of the holiday season. Each year yours truly is forced to take off 2 weeks for the holidays, at my own expense mind you, and I add a third just for good measure. Prior to hunkering the shop for the closing year and preparing for the onslaught of the next, visions and plans raced through my head of what I had planned at home.

A new home I settled into at the first of the year, a whole acre of beautiful luscious… sand. Alright there is more to the land then just the dreary tan of the gritty earth, but looking out it’s perfect, it’s virgin and it’s just waiting to be molded into a perfect landscape of vegetables and fruits and a picture perfect desert oasis. There is trimming, raking, weeding and theading abound, mulching and dozing the earth for it to be fertility sound, revamping with repairs, replacements, whosits and whatits with thatches and catches… oops sorry was thinking about “How the Grinch Stole Christmas.” My home, a place I rent but one day will own, needs some love and care and I had plans to conquer some of those on my glorious break from the stress and conundrum of intellects at work.

Looking back as those quiet days come to a close, as I glance out my back window chugging my hot coffee, damn I haven’t done a single thing. As I shake my head, I realize… this place isn’t going anywhere and neither am I.

Safer sufferings – Thought of the Day

THIS IS AMERICA... WHERE THE FOUR FREEDOMS LIV...

THIS IS AMERICA… WHERE THE FOUR FREEDOMS LIVE – NARA – 515767 (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

As the great American days of yesteryear diminishes in the perspective views of my generation and past, most must wonder what has happened to those great American days.

The glory days of America where our freedoms were plentiful and our options of enjoyment were bountiful, do not seem, but are being taken away and controlled because they have been deemed “unsafe.” Dont you miss the days of yore, the days of pure fun and when America seemed to be an awesome and productive place to live.

When you were able to pile the family in the minivan or faux-wooden panel station wagon and head to the beach, stake your claims next to a cement ring and spent the entire day enjoying the sun, the wave and the salty sea air destroying your hair. Then the fires begin to roar as the horizon turns a reddish-orange hue, and the metal coat hangers get bent into makeshift cooking utensils for roasting marshmallows and weenies.

Or how about when the street would be closed down on the 4th of July because the entire neighborhood decided to hold a party to enjoy the day dedicated to our freedoms. Barbeques would be roaring with steaks, hotdogs and burgers, mothers sitting in circles enjoying the gab of whatever mothers talked about, and fathers in their tank tops holding a spatula in one hand, a beer in the other yelling at little Johnny to be careful when running around with those magical pieces of metal that shoot hot sparks out at a rapid rate. And in the dark of night, a five gallon bucket of water sat conspicuously close to burnt out spots on the street where the brave souls of the fire would light the fireworks as the kids and others oohed and aahed.

And when basically anything harvested or grown was safe to consume regardless of how it was made or what was injected into it. When sugar was pure cane and used in everything to make it sweeter and potentially trick kids into thinking that it was good for them. When a fast-food joint was just that, a place to get low-cost, fast food that necessarily wasn’t the best food to be eating but it was so damn good, and the menu didn’t contain labels warning of MSG’s or fish cooked here signs or salads or only white meat in the nuggets or no pink goo in the meat. And when someone spoke about soy, they meant the dark spicey liquid used in chinese food.

Or how about when children were actually held responsible for their own actions and own failings in school, not the teachers or school districts or society, video games or music.

Or when professional sports athletes participated in sports knowing the risks to their health, mind and lives, and yet knowing that there could be no recourse or monetary gains if they got injured from the sports. Basically, when football was a mans sports, where blood, sweat and tears were the core foundation of showing a great game, and if a concussion occurred then that was the fault of the player and the risks were known and accepted.

Or when our words were made public and people were allowed to listen to them without jurisdiction on if it will offend someone, when our freedoms of speech were allowed to flow free.

Reminisce of these yore are due to an ever-growing issue with our local, state and country governments. If it is not or has not been obvious to you, the yesteryear of America were more free, and more enjoyable. The citizens were productive, families were large as well as bonds between neighbors. Life was more enjoyable back then. Then came the micro managing of our governments and elected officials who think in their own twisted and diluted worlds society will be safer by what they feel is safe for them. Our governments are slowly taking away the American feeling we all knew and loved, claiming those enjoyments as unsafe. Yet with them making everyone “safer” in their own eyes, American society seems to be sad and ailing.

Isn’t it strike someone odd that when the government kept their greedy ignorant self-righteous noses out of everyday lives of the American families, we were all much happier. But since the turn of health conscious, politically correct years have come upon us and governments have stepped in to control foods and enjoyments of yesteryear, American society doesn’t feel so… American anymore.